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The Daily Prophet

Will Harry Potter make your kid turn his grandmother's china teapot into a Horcrux?

Posted by: Carol Lombardi

Thursday, June 14, 2007 12:29 AM

Of course there are always some people who want to spoil the fun. Laura Mallory has made it her life's work to remove Harry Potter from the schools in Gwinnett County, Georgia, because Christianity clearly cannot co-exist with, um, well...with fictional books, I guess.

Here's a newsflash: Christianity has survived much worse than Harry Potter books, such as the stigma of being associated with people like Mallory.

Since Mallory, by her own admission, has never read any of the books (I bet her kids have, though) she must be basing her objections on other experiences with fiction. Perhaps her kids read Dr. Seuss and have been haunting the Humane Society looking for their very own 6-foot-tall cat wearing a striped hat and talking in verse.

After her latest defeat in the courts, Mallory wrote an editorial explaining, in an extremely unclear manner, what her problem is.

So who gets to tell Mallory that Daniel Radcliffe is an actor ?. He's not REALLY Harry Potter because (whisper) there is no Harry Potter. (end whisper.) He's a character in a book.

When I first read about this, I was pretty sure it was either an Onion-style parody or a publicity scheme. It wasn't in the Onion, though. And surely someone would have uncovered a hoax by this time. However, feel free to persuade me that this lady cannot be for real and don't forget to vote in the daily poll.